W H E N Y O U F E E L D E F E A T E D

because the sink is overflowing with dishes from last night's supper

and tonight's dinner isn't ready yet, though small hands grasp at the hem of your skirt and small voices whimper for food, and papa is going to be home soon

because you've exploded on the littles for minor wrongdoings, giving into anger

when your words and actions are lacking the fruits of the spirit. joy. patience. kindness. gentleness. self-control. love.

when you pray with clenched fists, refusing to fully surrender

as you walk from one room to another, you step on legos scattered, see the tornado that went through the littles bedroom, clothes and toys everywhere

and your just so.very.tired. from it all

because you can't relinquish control. or your agenda. the list. don't they know you have a million things to do today.

the piles and piles of laundry.

and your eye's linger on the dying plant that's been neglected for too long

and then the lies seep in. tiny little whispers, failure. you are no good at this. today I have failed.

my voice has been too loud, too hard. my hands haven't been gentle. my heart hasn't bowed before the One. and it's hard to give thanks in this place. hard to see grace of day in, day out. exhaustion. sameness. in the mundane. when your heart is hurting and heavy, when you are surrounded by noise and needs, and there just doesn't seem like there will ever be an end.

and you long to be on the mountain. to have your moses moment. to see, hear, feel him near. to know him, intimately, again. to let him breathe life into you once, again.

remember.

He sees. He sees it all. you. me. He sees the messes we make, of our homes, of our hearts. He sees the tired look in your eyes, the slight slump in your shoulders - the look of defeat.

and.

he whispers, just like he did to moses, ' my presence will go with you, and I will give you rest'

and.

he whispers, just like he did to paul, 'my grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness'

and. 

he whispers, just like he did to jeremiah, that